A tough week
This week has been tough for me, hence my late post. Not only have I been trying to prepare myself for my now scheduled for Thursday C-section, but my mother in law passed away, missing out on meeting her new grandchild by 9 days.
It has been a time of deep sadness but also reflection and I wanted to spend a little bit of time talking about something my mother in law taught me.
I met her over fifteen years ago when I first started seeing my husband. There was this small, quiet, grandmotherly figure, busting about in the kitchen in an unassuming and out of the way kind of manner. My then boyfriend, now husband, left me in the capable hands of the women of his family (none of whom I had met before) and disappeared off into man-land at the back of the family home.
If I’m honest, I’ll tell you I was upset with him for leaving me, but I was also a confident strong young woman, how bad could it be right? Let me tell you how bad it was. My sweet little nanna-like, mother in law to be, threated to shoot me with a pistol she kept in the garage if I so much as looked at her son wrongly.
Now that I think on it, it’s hilarious. I’m sure (or at least 98% sure) that she wouldn’t actually have shot me. But when talking about it with the family while preparing to farewell her this week, it got me thinking about how powerful that mother-child bond is. Her son was thirty, had been living out of home for over thirteen years and she was still determined to protect him.
I feel like that about my children, both my four year old daughter and my unborn baby. And recognising that I do, has come from spending time with, getting to know and understanding an incredible woman whose little mouse exterior hid the heart and soul of a lioness protecting her cubs.
I am not and will not ever make a judgement on anyone who decides that breastfeeding is not for them, for any reason. I would like to say that I loved the experience with my daughter, I didn’t. And as it turns out, my daughter wasn’t that fussed about it either. But I know that it made us closer. I know that it put us in sync, and it gave us the opportunity to start that mother-child connection in a real and concrete way that perhaps I wouldn’t have experienced otherwise, given she was a C-section baby.
I haven’t mentioned any products in this post, and I usually do. If you’re interested in something to help you bond and connect with your newborn, have a look at the wide range of baby slings and baby wrap carriers available. Choose one that will keep your baby close to your heart, and that you can use for a long time. You are, or you will be a parent, and you will want to hold your children close and protect baby long after they need you to.
Take some time to reflect on your family, they may have been wonderful, appreciate them. They may have been horrible, learn from their mistakes.
Thursday, I will meet my new baby. I know I will feel the same about them as I do my daughter. Like my mother in law, I’ll want to keep them close and protect them from any harm, real or imagined. Perhaps they’ll need it, perhaps not.
I’ll let you know.